“OK guys, one more thing,” history teacher Ginny Stroud says in last-day-of-school-’76-set comedy film “Dazed and Confused.” “This summer when you’re being inundated with all this American bicentennial Fourth Of July brouhaha, don’t forget what you’re celebrating. And that’s the fact that a bunch of slave-owning, aristocratic, white males didn’t want to pay their taxes.”

Whether the year’s 1976 or 2023 or 3014, there’s no better way to culinarily celebrate Independence Day (or any summer afternoon), than consuming the most American of all processed meats: The hot dog.

Oh yeah. Here comes AL.com’s picks for top five places to get hot dogs in Huntsville. No chains here, national or regional, just Huntsville-based outfits. There’s more than a quintet of worthy hot–doggers in Huntsville, so your top five might be way different than ours. Out food lists are meant to be the start of a conversation not the final word.

Our Birmingham’s best hot dogs list howled Monday. Mobile’s is set to pounce Wednesday. In recent weeks, we celebrated Huntsville’s best barbecue, pizza, burgers and ice cream. But enough intro. It’s time for the wieners to hit the buns.

MORE: Birmingham’s best hot dogs: Our Top 5

5. BIG SPRING CAFE

3507 Governors Drive S.W., Huntsville, bigspringcafe.com,

As Huntsville’s recent growth evolves food culture here to wider hues, the city’s vintage favorites’ charm grows too. For example, Big Spring Cafe, which dates back to the 1920s and said to be Huntsville’s oldest surviving restaurant. Even though BSC has been at its latest location for fewer years than Gen Z pop-singer Billie Eilish has been alive, the restaurant’s Governors Drive digs already exude classic diner vibes. In an era when Huntsville hot dogs frequently costs as much or more than matinee movie tickets, Big Spring Café’s hot dogs are budget friendly. Their menu is heavy on burgers and breakfast.

What to order: They’re both under three bucks, so get both the chili dog and slaw dog. The latter is slathered with ketchup-slaw, a tangy-sweet concoction which is actually more like slaw-ketchup in terms of ratio. Big City Café’s clientele is blue collar, and these are blue collar ‘dogs in the best way.

4. TOYBOX BISTRO

511 Jordan Lane N.W., Huntsville, toyboxbistro.com

Toybox Bistro doubles as a nerd-culture mini-museum. A fleet of Star Wars spaceship toys hang from the ceiling. There’s a covet-worthy AT-AT Walker toy on display as well as various action figures and collectibles from across copious geek-universes. This place isn’t for hot normies whose extent of nerd-dom is dressing up as sexy superheroes for Halloween or watching blockbuster movies. This place is for real-deal got-bullied-for-it-as-a-kid nerds.

What to order: Toybox serves half-pound, Michael Fassbender-worthy wieners. The Sonic Gut-Buster is the move. Drenched in a family-recipe chili (made with local beer from Yellowhammer Brewing), queso and diced onion. The menu accurately quips “antacids sold separately.” But the pain’s worth the gain.

3. NOMADS ROAD DOGS

Mobile vendor, Huntsville, nomadsroaddogs.com

If you frequent local breweries, farmers markets, music festivals, pool parties and parking lots, you may’ve noticed a silver food cart underneath a red umbrella. That would be Nomads Road Dogs. Operated by Johnson High School product Brett Byrom, formerly a cook at Huntsville Westin hotel, Nomads (no apostrophe) brings Southern sass to their ’dogs. And their hot dogs are delish. The menu items have Huntsville-centric names, like “The Monte Sano Dog,” “Whitesburg Dog” and “South Parkway Dog.” It’s easy to root for the friendly folks behind Nomads. It’s a family venture, with Brett’s wife Jill Byrom taking orders and their kids sometimes lending a hand during food service too.

What to order: Even if you use a fork (which you kinda have to), the 565 Dog requires a heavy investment in napkins. Messy as a divorce but much tastier, this all-beef hot dog is covered in mac-and-cheese, collards, jalapenos and more.

2. THE NOOK

3305 Bob Wallace Ave. S.W., Huntsville, thenooktavern.com

During the nascent days of the city’s craft-beer scene, The Nook was a hub for both brewers and enthusiasts. Although craft-beer has since broken big here, The Nook’s just as awesome as it ever was and remains a true-blue locals haunt. This tavern’s space goes back to the 1960′s when it was known as Napoleon’s Nook. After several other incarnations (Putt’s Place, anyone?), it was rebooted in 2007 as simply The Nook, founded by retired engineer Connell Allen. Today, the beer list remains prodigious, with suds from local to Kentucky to Denmark to Belgium. The Nook’s food menu’s bona fides include Louisiana fare and their epic German food night on Tuesdays.

What to order: The Nook’s Chicago Dog is an all-beef beauty on a poppy seed bun, electrified by puckered-pickle sweet green relish. Sport peppers add sass. The tomato wedges are garden fresh. Mustard, onions, celery salt. A Ditka-Jordan-Oprah-Belushi flavor bomb.

1. NEW SOUTH HOT DOG & SUSHI

Mobile vendor, Huntsville, newsouthhotdogandsushi.com

Like Adam Sandler in a dramatic lead or Miley Cyrus singing Led Zeppelin, hot dogs and sushi are a surprisingly effective juxtaposition – at least in the bands of Albert Toh. By transposing sushi panache to hot dogs, plus offering ace sushi rolls too, Toh’s New South food trailer has become a new-generation HSV food standout. For example. New South’s Crunchy Dog makes use of pork rinds, eel sauce, spicy mayo, avocado and cream cheese.

What to order: The Volcano Dog has a big bark and bigger flavors. Avocado, bacon, cheddar, fresh jalapeno, sesame seeds, wasabi mayo and sriracha. Balance, texture, originality and oomph. They’re all there to spare.

RELATED: Meet the Asian American chef behind Huntsville’s hottest food truck

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